Sunday, 10 October 2010

The Top 5 Funniest News Items Ever

I was trying to cheer myself up by checking out some funny sites and came across these very funny but genuine news items.

1) The Dumbest Burglar in Britain Steals Neighbour's Curtains... 

A burglar who stole his next-door neighbour’s curtains was caught when he put them up in his own window, a court was told.

Jason Williams from Slough, Berkshire,was jailed for two years and five months after admitting his fourth burglary.
The 38-year-old was rumbled when the neighbours went to his home and asked him why he had got their curtains

(mentally-challenged or what?)

2) Alleged rapist files charges against victim in Sweden on HIV infection grounds

Helsingborgs Dagblad, a Swedish newspaper, reported Monday that a man who has been arrested for sexual assault, has now pressed charges against the woman, whom he allegedly attacked, for not disclosing that she had HIV.

(Teaches the dirt-bag a lesson. He got more than his way)

3) Thousands of Dutch Prepare for 2012 Apocalypse

Many people in the Netherlands expect the world to end in 2012 and thousands say they are taking precautions to prepare for the apocalypse.

According to United Press International, theories on the supposed catastrophe varied, most tied the 2012 date to the end of the Mayan calendar.
Many of those are stocking up on emergency supplies, including life rafts and other equipment.

(Why?? What for if the world is ending?!?)

4) A Painful Lesson in Auto-Eroticism

Wedged into a two-seater sports car a near naked man was immobilized by a slipped disk, trapping his woman companion beneath him, according to a doctor writing in a medical journal here in London.

The desperate woman tried to summon help by honking the horn with her foot. An ambulance man, fireman and passers by quickly surrounded the couple’s car in Regents Park. “The lady found herself trapped beneath 200 pound of pain- racked, immobile man” said Dr Brian Richards.
“To free the couple, firemen had to cut away the car frame” he added.
The distraught woman, helped out of the car and into a coat, sobbed, “How am I going to explain to my husband what has happened to his car?”

(Cheating doesn't pay, does it?)

5) Harry Potter Broomstick - Mattel

Mattel introduced in 2008 the "Harry Potter Broomstick". It's a battery-powered toy that resembles the flying Nimbus 2000 brooms from the Harry Potter movies. For added effect, the broom makes "flying noises" and vibrates.

After a while on the market, concerned parents noticed that mostly young girls seemed to enjoy the toy - especially the vibrating part...

Here are some of the customer reviews from the Toys R Us website:

Reviewer: Ashley from TX

My 12 year old daughter is a big Harry Potter fan, and loved the part with the Nimbus 2000, so I decided to buy her this toy. I was afraid she would think it was too babyish, but she LOVES this toy. Even my daughter's friends enjoy playing with this fun toy. I was surprised at how long they can just sit in her room and play with this magic broomstick! A great buy for any Harry Potter fan! :)

Reviewer: A toy enthusiast from Maine, USA

I recently bought this for my son, Vantro. He's a HUGE Harry Potter fan. Seen the movie 32 times (in the theaters) and made the paper. This toy gives him the ability to fly around the house zapping things. My only problem I see with the toy is the batteries drain too fast and his sister fights him over it, so now I need to buy her one

(anything to keep the kids amused!)

Sometimes the truth is funnier than fiction :)

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