I've been a man for most of my life, obviously, (I was a boy before that) and I never realized that being a male explained so many aspects of my character and surroundings!
It all started a couple of years ago with Madeleine, my beloved gf, when upon commenting on how I adore kissing her silky-smooth cheeks ,she replied -'that's because you're a guy!'
Soon after that startling revelation, I remember saying I didn't like cucumber very much, in sandwiches or salad. Madeleine's reply was delivered with such sincerity that I was instantly convinced of it's merit- 'That's because you're a guy!'
(I have since found out that cucumber is a favoured smell with women and is often used in deodorants, perfumes and shower gel. Yes, I admit to reading girly magazines... sometimes.)
On another occasion I was in the bedroom watching telly and heard a piercing loud shriek from the bathroom that made my heart miss a beat! Madeleine screamed.I ran to her aid as fast as I could.
'What's up love?' I asked.
'It's a huge spider...look...up there on the ceiling' stuttered Madeleine, horror etched in her face.
'Where?.. I can't see a spider' I replied, squinting hard, trying to focus on the tiny grey blob on the ceiling.
'There!..can't you see it, it's huge...look at the legs... moving!' cried Madeleine.
'Oh...yes... I see it' I said as I smacked the spider off the ceiling with my flip-flop.
'Madeleine, why do you scream when you see a spider?'
'Because I'm scared of them, obviously...duh !'.
'Ok, I don't like them much either but you don't hear me scream'
'That's because you're a guy.'
So, there you have it! Philosophy in the making.
Some people say "that's how it is" others say "it's God's will" but Madeleine says "that's because............